Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama.

There is no way I plugged in my iPad to charge overnight but neglected to plug in the charger, resulting in dead electronics the next morning.

I did not stay up late to make brownies for a meeting at work, pack the brownies in a container and leave them on the counter instead of taking them with me when I left in the morning. Even if I did, there is no way I left work (after arriving there early) to go retrieve said brownies. And even if all that were true, I certainly didn't end up cancelling the meeting I made the brownie for. And I know I didn't leave the container of leftover brownies that my co-workers didn't eat sitting on my desk when I left work for the night.

I did not text Ryan's teacher with the message "Ryan is having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad morning. He cried all the way to school. Whip him into shape, would you? :-) "  And even if I did, there's no way his teacher is so cool that she responded "Roger that! I'm on it!"

The Nose Knows

Yesterday was the carnival at the boys' school. One of the things they could spend their tickets on was getting their hair spray painted with colored hair spray. Wesley got green and Ryan got blue stripes and red polka dots. 

Both the boys took showers last night, but when Ryan came downstairs I noticed that, although his hair was wet, the hairspray didn't look much lighter.

"Ryan, did you wash your hair?"  I asked.

"Yes."

"With soap?" I probed.

Ryan hesitated half a second before answering that he did.

"Come here then."

Ryan froze. "Are you going to smell my hair?"

"Yes, I am."

"I'll be right back," he told me before bolting upstairs to the bathroom. When he returned, it was VERY obvious he had rubbed some shampoo into his barely damp hair in an effort to trick me. The bubbles gave him away.

"Ryan! Did you just rub shampoo in your hair so I can smell it?'

"Ummm..." 

"Ryan, I can see the bubbles. Go rinse it out."

At least he gets points for figuring out how to almost trick the smell test.

Yee-haw

Duane is generally a rock music or Weird Al kind of guy, but occasionally he really enjoys bluegrass. Last night he was listening to some bluegrass when Ryan piped up, "Dad, is that Wild West music?"   Too cute!

All Joy, No Fun

I'm listening to a parenting book right now entitled "All Joy and No Fun." I don't read a lot of parenting books because I firmly believe that all children are different and that a stranger isn't going to have the magic answer to make my children the happiest and most successful children on the block or make me a perfect parent. There are no perfect parents.  And really, that's what the book is about. It's NOT a guide to raising your kids, but a look at how modern parenthood (and the role of children) is different now than it ever has been before. It's fascinating stuff.

But that's not why I titled this post "All Joy, No Fun." No, I titled my post that because it perfectly sums up the special little slice that was yesterday morning. It was easily the worst morning I have had as a parent in a very long time.

How bad was it?  It was so bad, that I REALLY wish I had this mug and would have filled it appropriately.

It was BAD. From the moment both kids were awake, they fought with each other and with me. I don't think there was a single statement made that didn't result in an argument.  If something could fought over, it was. It was enough to make both boys cry in anger and frustration and me tear up while trying desperately to keep it together.  Ryan sobbed the whole way to school, prompting me to text his teacher and give her a heads up.

Both boys ended up having very good days at school (go figure) and we actually  pretty pleasant in the evening. We took them to gymnastics and things went pretty well there too. Well, they did until the last 5-10 minutes of class.

The coach had Wesley trying something on the bars that Wesley could not get the hang of. Wesley has done this thing before, but last night, it was just eluding him - which was enough to send him into tears again. He was so frustrated and mad at himself that he cried the whole way home, then curled into a ball on the couch with a blanket over his head. He fought us over taking a shower (which was non-negotiable because he was pretty smelly after gymnastics) and was simply unable to get himself together. It didn't matter what we told him - that everyone makes mistakes sometimes. That he's only on his 4th class and if he could do everything, he'd be the teacher. That even though you have done something once, it doesn't mean you are going to do it right every time. That professional athletes miss passes and kicks and fall just like everyone else.

By the time both boys went to bed, I was emotionally and physically exhausted. All joy and no fun. Some days are like that

Cat Heaven

I still miss Sanders a lot, and that is to be expected, but I am surprised by how much Ryan still seems to miss the old boy. He talks about him. He journals about him at school. He pets and holds Sanders' box. 

Last night Ryan and I were sitting quietly on the couch when he suddenly said, "Mommy, I was just prayer-ing about Sanders."

"You were praying about him?"

"Yes. And I was wondering where he is now."

I pulled Ryan in for a hug. "Honey, you know where he is."

"In Cat Heaven?" he asked.

"Yes in Cat Heaven."

"I wonder what Cat Heaven is like," Ryan mused.

"Well, no one knows for sure, but I think it's a place full of sunshine and where cats can drink all the milk they want and not get sick. I think all their favorite food is there. So if Sanders wants popcorn or peanut butter or -"

"Or Pop-Tarts!" interrupted Ryan.

"Or Pop-Tarts," I continued, "then he can have them. And I think there is always an angel ready to pet him."

My explaination seemed to make Ryan feel better and he went to bed. However, as soon as he woke up this morning, Ryan asked for Sanders' box. He sat on our bed petting it and then he sneaked it into his own room.

When I got to work I got the book "Cat Heaven" by Cynthia Rylant. Ryan and I read it together and he smiled and grinned the whole time we were reading. After we finished the book Ryan turned to me and said, "I wish I could go to Cat Heaven and get Sanders and bring him back to be with us again."

"I know. But he's really happy there."

"Yeah, and he's probably thinking about you every day," Ryan told me. "I'm just glad he isn't under one of those big rocks in a cemetery."

I have wondered quite a bit why Ryan is still so fixated on Sanders. I think part of it is because that is the first death he has ever experienced and he could see first hand how hard it was for me. I was a mess for days and I know that affected him. But then I started looking through some pictures of Sanders and noticed how many were of him and Ryan together.

And that's when it finally hit me. Ryan didn't just like Sanders and see him as a toy. He loved Sanders. And looking at these pictures and others, I can see that Sanders loved his "little human" right back. I'm sure Sanders thinks of Ryan every day too - and that he'll be waiting for both of us someday down the road.

Post Easter Goodies

At our house the Easter Bunny usually brings the boys coupons good for things like a trip to their favorite park, dinner of their choice, the ability to skip a chore or some extra computer time. They love it and I love that the bunny is thoughtful enough to limit their candy intake.

This evening Wesley came downstairs from his room and said he didn't think it was right that Duane and I never get coupons from the Easter Bunny, so he took it upon himself to make some for us.  Duane and I each got a set of egg-shaped coupons to redeem from the boys.

They are good for a free walk (meaning Wesley will go with us if we want), a picture from Wesley (which is super cool because we even get to pick what we want the picture to be of), dinner of our choice, an hour of quiet reading (which I cannot wait to use!) and a movie of our choice.

Isn't that just about the sweetest, most thoughtful thing? He's a pretty good egg.

Easter Weekend Photos

What a fabulous and busy weekend we had to celebrate Easter.  I felt a little frantic on Saturday because we had an egg hunt to go to, I volunteered for something at work and then went out with some friends, but it was all fun - just busy.  And of course, holidays are always a  bit hectic as we try to spend time with all our loved ones, but again, always fun and always worth it.

The boys with their friends M and J. This was at an egg hunt at Grandma's church. M informed several people there that she was going to marry Ryan one day.

Don't ask, I have no answer

The gang working on butterfly crafts.

Easter morning with a basket from the bunny

My handsome boys ready for church. They sang with the children's choir.

Hanging with Grandpa P.

Still a daddy's girl

Ryan showing his cousin Michael one of his new games

Kirk found a bad egg

This is what the older cousins do on Easter ;-)

We ended the day at Grandma and Grandpa H.'s house. Here's Grandpa H. getting ready to carve the ham.

My aunt Carol and her little sister (my mom)

Me, Carol, Mom, Cathy and Susan

The cousins - as you can tell, Sho thinks he's a little too old for this.

Wesley was actually holding a baseball bat behind his head in this picture, but I think he looks like a future Chippendale dancer

Winding down the day with a book in a box

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama.

I did not realize that, without a doubt, there are days I prefer one child over the other. What kind of mom would admit that?

I picked my mom up to go shopping one day and I know I didn't leave a store, unlock the car door, get in the passenger seat and wait for her to start driving when I had the keys and it was my car!

I did not wake up one morning extremely angry at Duane for something that happened in a dream I had.  Even if I did, the dream certainly wasn't about him forcing us to move out of our current house and into a haunted one instead.

I did not completely neglect to dye Easter eggs with my eggs. And there is no way they wouldn't have gotten to dye any eggs at all if Grandma had not stepped in.

So THAT'S Where the Money Goes!

Ryan made a purchase today by "borrowing" some  money from Duane and I with the promise to pay us back when we got home.  Upon arriving home, Duane went to get the money from Ryan's piggy bank.

Duane: What happened to your three dollars, Ryan?

Ryan: Um...leprechauns?

Me: It was not a leprechaun.

Ryan: The Easter Bunny?

Me: The Easter Bunny did not take any money from your piggy bank.

Ryan: I think maybe he did.

South and North

The W. family has spent the last couple of days driving all over. Yesterday we headed about 1.5 hours south to go to IKEA.  I LOVE IKEA, but Duane and the boys have never been. The boys were very excited about it,  but Duane wasn't really. He was a good sport though because there was a dresser I wanted to get and I needed him to look at it first.

Other than the fact that Ryan needed two bathroom breaks on the drive down to the store, the road trip was uneventful, but I guess that's kind of what you want when the family is taking a drive. Ryan was pretty bored on the way, but as soon as we got out of the car in the parking lot of IKEA he exclaimed, "I've been waiting my whole life to come here!" Grandma and Grandpa H. went too and we had a pretty good time!

We weren't in the store 30 seconds before Ryan saw this light.

"Look at the light! It's like a giant snowball! I love it!" cried Ryan

We ate lunch at the cafe, then sent the boys to child care while the grown ups shopped.

Team Brothers at the IKEA cafe

I really liked the child care at IKEA, but they limit the time kids can be in there. I completely understand why, but that left at least an hour that they had to shop with us. They hung in there pretty well, but by the time we left, they were more than ready to go.

Today we (they royal "we" meaning "Duane") finished putting the dresser from IKEA together. Of course, the instructions on those things are never clear, so we had to call in an expert.

We also took a trip north to Mansfield today. We had a lovely afternoon visiting with my aunt and hanging around downtown.

Lunch at Coney Island with rainbow ice cream for dessert

We went to the carrousel and the boys had three rides each. They always rode side-by-side and on the same type of animal. Team Brothers indeed.

Ryan used his money on a little white stuffed kitten he has named V.I.  Apparently she is the sister of his other stuffed cat, Violet.

We went to the the Children's Museum too. VERY fun place for the kids. Here they are playing the piano in the entrance

Wesley rescuing some of animals in the vet area.

Ryan giving V.I. some kind of examination

Checking out the bugs

Possibly the only time we'll see Wesley work on a car.

It was such a nice afternoon. Wore us all out - but we had fun. We've headed north this vacation. We've headed south. I'll be  glad to stay in the middle for a few days.