Some Kind of Morning

You know that song "Oh, What a Beautiful Morning" from the musical Oklahoma? It does not begin to describe my morning. Seriously. My morning was no where close to beautiful.

It started out pretty good. I got to sleep in a little bit and since it was Friday (jeans day at work) I didn't even have to shave my legs. Actually, it's probably a good thing I didn't have a razor in my hands at any point this morning, because I got the snot scared out of me when I opened the bathroom door. Nothing was wrong, but I did not expect to step out of the bathroom and straight into a four-year-old.

Once my heart started beating at a normal rate again I noticed that Ryan was calling out for me too. So I did a super quick blow dry on my hair and hurried upstairs to get myself and the boys dressed. Turns out that dressing myself was the easiest part.

When I walked into Ryan's room, I thought it was a little strange that his lamp was on - lamp, not overhead light, but I didn't think too much about it. I picked out clothes for Ryan, put him on the changing table and got a diaper out. Ryan threw the diaper on the floor. I picked it up in time to see him throw his clothes on the floor. So I got the diaper on him, then picked up his pants to put those on him. The only problem was that he didn't want his shorts on. I'd put them on and he'd try desperately to take them off. We must have played that little game at least three times - with the volume of Ryan's cries increasing each time.

I finally got the shorts on him, but the little stink is so skinny that they wouldn't stay up. I reached for Ryan's belt and he started screaming "No belt! No belt!" and tried taking his pants off again. I had to hold his pants up with one hand and try to work the belt with the other. Once I had the belt fastened, I was half deaf, but ready to start dealing with his shirt. At least getting that one was slightly less painful.

When Ryan was finally dressed I set him on the floor and walked over to turn off the lamp. Mt. St. Ryan erupted. "Nooooooo!!!! Mama, nooooooo!!!" Then he ran over and turned the lamp back on. Huh. I didn't know he could do that. Too bad we were getting ready to leave, so I turned the lamp back off. I was met with similar results, but this time he started hitting me too.

I scooped Ryan up (mostly so he'd stop hitting me) and went into Wesley's room, only to discover that Wesley crawled back in bed. I asked him to pick out an outfit, but he wanted me too, so I held a still screaming Ryan in one arm and chose some clothes with the other. AND THEN WESLEY REFUSED TO DRESS HIMSELF!!! Needless to say, I was at my wits end by that point.

Somehow we all managed to survive getting ready for the day. We got into van with no problem and drove to Grandma and Grandpa H.'s with almost no problem. I say "almost" because as we were pulling into their driveway, Ryan vomited on himself. "No problem, " I thought. "I'll just put him in his spare outfit when we go into the house." And then I realised that I had left the diaper bag at home - no spare outfits for either child. Thank goodness Target is down the street and opens at 8:00. I dropped the kids off and went to buy spare outfits for each of them to keep at Grandma and Grandpa's.

Believe it or not, I made it to work on time. I put my things away and heaved a huge sigh. "You must have had a mommy morning" one of my co-workers said. I couldn't have put it better myself!